If You Don’t Play You Can’t Win

I think “if you don’t play you can’t win” used to be the slogan of the lottery here in Ontario.  Whenever I enter an event that is important to me (and even some that aren’t) I find that I get nervous.  This is not a fun feeling so it tends to discourage me from playing.  Does that ever happen to you?

When I was in school I remember that I never wanted to compete in anything unless I thought I could win.  Winning didn’t have to be first place.  When I was about ten I played in a very competitive music contest.  I played the piano and I was playing against a lot of big strapping thirteen year olds.  I had played up.  So it was wonderful to come in third.  My dad was so proud of me.  You can imagine the picture I made.  I was a very tiny child and my feet couldn’t really reach the pedals and I was standing there among girls who were literally twice my size.

I find it hard to lose.  It makes me mad.  It makes me want to win even more.  I want to try harder.  Be better.  Being competitive is a blessing and a curse.  I think you have to be competitive to really succeed at something.  But it is tough when you lose.  And some times I don’t want to take the elevator down to the tournament.

I know I inherit all this from my dad.  He played bridge but when he realized I was a better player than he was, he never played another hand.  I understand how he felt.  I do.  But he was wrong.

Now if you haven’t tried to play a competitive game, duplicate in your club, a local tournament or even something better, go ahead, try it.  Nothing really bad can happen and who knows some times you might even be one of the winners.

One of the things you might find is winning most things isn’t all it is cut out to be.  You win.  They might take your picture.  You feel good for a few minutes.  But then you realize it was never about winning.

Don’t be afraid.  Just do it.  It gets easier the more you do.  Remember you will have lots of company.  Almost all the players there will “lose”.  Many larger tournaments have a wonderful IN (intermediate Novice) program with free mini lessons.

And if you happen to be in Montreal in the next few days at the Montreal Regional you might find me there.  Competing.